Accountability Works
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The Truth sets you free!

         My name is Frank, and I'm a sexual addict! Using that term is something I thought I would never do. I always heard the term but never applied it to myself. A sexual addict, I thought, was some sleezy, dirty, lecherous man. So I couldn't be a sexual addict. But I was wrong! A sexual addict was someone like me, someone who was preoccupied with sex, someone who had to indulge in some form of secret sexual fantasy or behavior almost every day. It could be pornography and masturbation, or it might be flirting and having sex with someone. Sometimes it was masturbating while I was driving my car. Sometimes it was voyeurism ! Every day I had to have my sexual fix. And it was causing me to withdraw from intimacy in real relationships, my relationship with God, and had a devastating influence on my spiritual life.
          I discovered "Accountability Works" on the internet and I want to recommend it to you. God used it to help me get control of my bondage to sex. It gave me the understanding about myself and some very important skills I needed to get control. Now I can say, "I'm a sexual addict" to myself and to at least one other person. Now somebody knows the truth about me. What a relief! And that was the first step in getting the help I needed!

         Understand something very important! You have been called by God to resolve your sin problem with sex. Do you realize that God has spoken to you in your heart and in your spirit about your struggle? He speaks to every Christian man who deals with sexual sin problems. Some can hear Him, some can’t hear Him. Some hear Him and ignore Him. Some hear Him and respond to Him. That's what you're doing right now! You would not be reading this unless you are responding to the conviction and the call He made to you to resolve this sexual issue in your life. He put a call; an invitation upon your life.
          How does Accountability, Counsel and Confession work to break the compulsion and addiction to pornography and masturbation and other besetting sexual sin? Simply put, because it lifts the hidden, secret activity into the light. It's living in the darkness of hidden sin, like the dark dampness of a concealed cellar, where decay, disease and deterioration fester. Paul says, (Ephes 5:5-15)

For of this much you can be certain: that neither the immoral nor the dirty-minded nor the covetous man (which latter is, in effect, worshipping a false god) has any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God. Don't let anyone fool you on this point, however plausible his argument. It is these very things which bring down the wrath of God upon the disobedient. Have nothing to do with men like that - once you were "darkness" but now you are "light". Live then as children of the light. The light produces in men quite the opposite of sins like these - everything that is wholesome and good and true. Let your lives be living proofs of the things which please God. Steer clear of the activities of darkness; let your lives show by contrast how dreary and futile these things are. (You know the sort of things I mean - to detail their secret doings is really too shameful). For light is capable of "showing up" everything for what it really is. It is even possible (after all, it happened to you!) for light to turn the thing it shines upon into light also. Thus God speaks through the scriptures: "Awake, you who sleep, arise from the dead, and Christ will give you light."
Through the apostle John, Jesus said these words of importance addressed to people living in hidden sin!
(John 3:19-21) Light has come into the world, but men loved darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil. 20Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that his deeds will be exposed. 21But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what he has done has been done through God."
          Verse 21 is especially important. What does it mean? It means that anybody who is honestly facing the truth that he is caught up in sin will bring it into the light and disclose it to someone else.
          In fact, there are three persons to whom disclosure is made: Disclosing the truth to yourself, disclosing the truth to another person, and disclosing the truth to God. Such threefold disclosure makes it plain that all he has done has been done by the work of the Holy Spirit of God who calls him to the light (of accountability, counsel and confession). This threefold disclosure is a powerful antidote against Satan and your weak flesh.
          When such threefold disclosure and Accountability is joined with Counsel and Confession, you will be on your way of managing, diminishing and eliminating addictive pornography and masturbation and other sexual sin. As a Counselor who has worked with many sexually addictive Christians, I can tell you that the learning and strategies shared in this program really work when you fully learn and apply them.

          Here’s another way to look at the darkness of sexual sin. The Johari Window - named for its creators, Joseph Luft and Harry Ingham – can be a useful tool for understanding how sexual addiction functions in a Christian’s life. I have adapted it for the purposes of our use in this Program.
          The four "panes" or areas of the Johari Window represent four parts of our Self.
           My Public or Open Area is what I show others about me; what I know and show others, and what others know about me.
           My Hidden Area is what I choose to hide from others. These are the things about myself that I know about, but I do not reveal to others. I conceal them from others.
          My Blind Area are parts of me others see or know about me but I do not.
          My Unknown Self are parts of me I do not know about myself nor do others.
          The Omniscient Area , represented by the circle which encloses all areas of our life, is the knowledge which God has of us. "His eyes are on the ways of men; he sees their every step" (Job 34:21).
          We all have these four parts of Self, but their sizes vary in each of us. Some of us have very large Open areas, or very large Hidden Areas. The Christian entrapped by sexual sin has a large Hidden area because he is hiding and keeping secret a lifestyle of sexual sin which consumes much of his psycho-emotional, spiritual attention. Generally speaking, anyone who is maintaining a large Hidden Area is vulnerable to great stress and emotional crisis. This is very true of a SAM (Sexually Addicted Man). To diminish this stress and avoid crisis, a SAM must find a way to move his struggle with sexual addiction out of the area of private hidden secretiveness, into the Open Area.

This is done through disclosure and regular accountability.
          Before reading any further, ask yourself the question, "Have I ever been born again? Have I become a child of God by faith in the Lord Jesus?" If you have not or desire to renew your commitment, come now and receive Him as your Lord and Savior. Say this after me, "Father God, I come to you in need. I cannot resolve these issues of sexuality in my life without your help and guidance. I need a spiritual and supernatural renewal. Right now I believe, I accept, I receive your Son, the Lord Jesus Christ, to be my Savior and my Deliverer. I thank you Father God. Amen!"

How serious are you?

          But let's be clear in our understanding, the accountability offered through this website is only for serious Christian men who will commit themselves to knife-sharp accountability, counsel and confession. Knife-sharp accountability: "For the word of God is quick, and powerful, and sharper than any twoedged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart" (Heb 4:12). It only works if you are willing to be courageously honest and open with your counselor, holding no secrets back or softening your words to excuse or cushion the truth. The fact is, you cannot afford to lie or distort reality anymore. You have done that for quite awhile already! You must be willing to make a break with all deception, distortion, excuses and compromises.
          Are you sure that your're ready for this commitment of strict accountability, a sincere effort to use the counsel, and honest confession before God?

What will you have to do?

           You will have to take the risk of fully, personally disclosing yourself to your Accountability Counselor (AC) who will assist and counsel you, care for you, pray for you and hold all you share with him in strict confidentiality. The first and last month (Learnings 1 and 6) are free. During the first month you will be able to open Learning 1 which gives you an important overview of Accountability Works . If you decide to continue in the program your AC will work with you through Learnings 2 through 6, which will share important information and strategies to help you overcome your sexual sin problems. NOTE WELL: you can only begin the program on the first week of a calendar month. You can begin any month in the calendar. You must be willing to stay accountable, and receive his counsel with sincere efforts to apply it to your life. You will be accountable to report weekly (See: "The Weekly Email") to your AC by email. This is followed by an return email from your AC with personal and planned counsel related to the learning for the month.
          And so you are commiting yourself to weekly emails of accountability and prayerful confession with helpful counsel. In these emails you are free to speak about anything relevant to your life as it impacts on your sexual difficulties. But you must especially recount the kind and frequency of sexual acting out behavior (whatever it may be).

Now having read the above, please consciously take some time to pray about the decision to enroll in

AccountabilityWorks.
If you sense that you should take a first step in contacting me, simply send an email along with a brief statement of your desire to participate and a brief statement about yourself and your problem. In this first email, you may sign it with a fictitious name. Then I'll be in touch with you shortly.

The grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, and the love of God the Father, and the communion of the Holy Spirit, be with you!

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Your AC (Accountability Counselor) is Dr Bill Consiglio MSW DMin SORT who is a professional Christian therapist specializing in sexual disorders and addictions. Dr. William E. (Bill) Consiglio is founder of

AccountabilityWorks
and of HOPE Ministries of CT. He has specialized in the work of Sexual Orientation ResolutionTherapy (SORT) for the last twenty-five years with Christians who are resolving and managing homosexuality, and other sexual addictions and disorders.
          He is the author of Homosexual No More (Chariot-Victor Books, Vance Lee View, Colorado Springs-l99l) and The Forward Program(Self-published, 2005) and several articles for Christian journals. He is a former Board Member of Exodus International. He received his MSW from University of Pittsburgh and his Ma.Divinity and Doctor of Divinity in pastoral counseling from Trinity Theological Seminary, Newburgh, IN.
          He was for 27 years Associate Professor of Clinical Social Work, Southern Ct State University (retired); and a full-time Christian Psychotherapist.
          He is married to Linda, and has two daughters and lives in Hamden, CT. where he also serves as part-time assistant pastor at Christ Evangelical Church, Bible study teacher, and professional consultant and educator to many conferences, churches and denominations on sexual disorders and addictions.